Yesterday was nice. I love Saturdays! We usually don't do a lot on Saturdays. We do some shopping, but usually spend the day resting around the house. Another couple from church came over for dinner and "Taboo" and we had a great time.
Today, I'm getting prepared to lead worship. It is very important for me on Sunday morning to spend some time in reading and meditation, with hopes of mentally and spiritually preparing myself for worship. In short, I feel that have to have practiced worship before I can lead it.
Oswald Chambers advises us to "continually go back to to foundation of your affections and recollect where the source of power is. You have no right to say--'O Lord, I am so exhausted.' He saved and sanctified you in order to exhaust you. Be exhausted for God, but remember that your supply comes from Him."
I have just read chapter 2 of The Sacred Romance, by Brent Curtis and John Eldredge. The book is about recapturing the "romance" in the relationship with God. The subtitle is "Drawing Closer to the Heart of God." I am now being asked to write some reflections on my reactions to this chapter, entitled "An Unknown Romancing." The thrust of this chapter makes me think back to the days of my childhood. Many was the day when I would leave our house, walk up the street, take a right, and follow the next street to its dead end at the foot of a "mountain." (Just a small hill, but to me it was a mountain.) This mountain was the closest thing to "wilderness" that I could find in our town. It was full of scrabbly trees (mostly mesquite trees) and really big rocks. I'm talking boulders bigger than cars. I remember how much fun I had just climbing around on those boulders. (Today, I'm sure that would be forbidden as being "too dangerous." Pshaw.) Back then, it still wasn't illegal to shoot a BB gun, so I took that along sometimes. I never shot at anything living, just at cans and bottles and stuff that had been left behind by others. These times were almost always spent alone. I don't think I knew at that point that was being "wooed" into a deeper relationship with my Father. As I have grown, I have cherished times when I can get alone outdoors, undistracted by noises of city and "civilization." That doesn't happen very often these days.
The book asks me to recall a favorite story or movie from my childhood. I always loved "The Music Man," with Robert Preston and Shirley Jones (a remake is emminent with Matthew Broderick playing Professor Harold Hill). I think, as a child, I may have seen myself as little Ronnie Howard. As an adult, I probably see myself more in the role of Harold Hill. Not that I would be a con man, but to be charismatic and have the kind of influence that he was able to have on people.
The workbook asks about memories of intimacy as a child. Sadly, I can't remember much intimacy. I don't remember having a whole lot of intimacy with my parents. I was an only child. I remember more intimacy with my Grandparents (both sides) than with my own parents. My Grandmama was my best friend. My other two Grandparents followed closely behind. Also, my cousins were very close friends, especially on my Mother's side. I got very close to my oldest cousin, Joan, for a while as teenagers. I have not been in touch with any of them, lately. Perhaps I need to fix that.